Had dinner with XRtech and LS Fri and Sat night. It’s probably the first time I had dinner with a professional who is younger than me. I came to a sudden realization. No one ask how old I am or question if I’m old enough to do my job anymore!
It works great for me professionally, but do I look more aged? I sort of feel it, but do I look it? Tired? Weathered? Old? Mature? No good!
With the arrival of EK, moving to a new professional space, becoming the face of the pharmacy, I do feel different. More of a leader, more of a delegator, more in charge. Am I getting there?
Once again, I stopped blogging regularly. Wow, what else is new. I don’t even want to call this re-re-restart because that’s just setting up for failure. I need to build a routine that sets up for success.
A lot has happened in the past 4 months. Seeing the toll it took on me May-Aug for marketing, I was advised by AG, Fi, and many others to take Sept-Dec semester off. But, idealistic and ambitious me decided school was indeed not a good idea but must keep going. I took HR and nearly died. Really busy at work + Sept yearend + Oct Nov flu vaccination clinics + Dec holidays + training a new pharmacist + renovation lease going through in Oct/Nov, I dug my way out, but also lost a lot on the way. I don’t know if I want to do that anymore. I don’t feel I’m at the age where I want to just put myself or things that are important to me on the line like that. I might not get it back.
Knowing Jan will be a busy month with relocation, I took the Sept-Dec lesson and did not enrol in a course. I don’t like working lots, but it felt good even working overtime. I can just focus on one thing, not feeling guilty or worried I won’t have time for schoolwork. I had to cancel my HK trip in Jan; it’s too bad but I’m glad I did because I wouldn’t be work-free and just relax with the relocation happening here. The relocation project was a lot of work and put me in a discomfort zone for most of it, but it also gave me insight what’s not my forte and have no interest in. I came to an understanding Google and I can’t do everything. I need to get and accept help, then trust and respect them for their expertise in their field.
It’s mid February now, we need to get 2016 going. 2015 went by too fast and much of it the wrong way. I lived a good part of this month/year in indulging on my issues; there’s time for that but it’s time to either accept it or work on it now. I will not become the type of people I don’t like, sit complain, do nothing but keep complaining.
Serenity prayer time.
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.”